Dear Short Bowel Syndrome,
You are a jerk. You are literally the crappiest thing that’s happened to me. I hate having you as a part of my life and I wish I had never been introduced to you.
I knew nothing of you before, most people don’t, and most people don’t think you’re as awful as you are because your name isn’t scary sounding. Maybe as bowels you were just tired of people not thinking of you in general and that’s why you decided to act up. I’ve always known what you, my bowels, do in my body, but do we ever REALLY think about it? You digest my food, but nobody ever wonders what would happen if you were to go missing. Well now that I know, I wish I was ignorant to that fact again. Maybe nobody thinks much of you because you’re such an irritable bastard!
Well now you have my attention. I miss you more than I’ve missed anything. I would give basically anything to have you back. You feel like a long lost lover, one that I will forever yearn for. One that I will never forget. Your absence forever haunting me.
I know you’ll never come back, you’re gone forever, but know that you will never be forgotten and that I will think of you every day.
With love and despair,